Valentine's Day Wedding !

I wanted to wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day! I went to an African wedding today but since they do not celebrate Valentine's Day here in this country, the couple did not choose this day to get married because of the day. In fact, they have been "married" already for 19 years!

There are three steps to marriage here in Gabon. The first is the Traditional Wedding when the families of both bride and groom come together negotiate the "Bride Price". Officially in the country there should not be a "Bride Price" but all families require it. I have only been to one Traditional Wedding in which the "side of the groom" presents items to the "side of the bride". They refuse and say that she is worth more. Then the groom's family goes into huddle to see what else to offer. They hold back items and money to be able to present as the traditional wedding proceeds. Finally the Bride's family agree that the bride price offered for their daughter is enough and the couple then get to sit on the same love seat and are presented as Mr and Mrs, followed by the public "kiss" and of course a meal! These were all it took to get married in the past but not any more!

As far as the government is concerned however this couple are still Mr. and MISS! They no longer recognize Traditional Weddings. A public official must perform the wedding. Since this couple who married today had already been traditionally married for 19 years, they decided to have the official ceremony done in a home.

The Assistant Mayor of the town, a woman, performed the official marriage asking the necessary questions of the couple. One question was, "Do you plan on having a Monogamist marriage or a polygamous marriage! Yes, you read right. They have to chose weather the groom will have only one wife or if he will take more than one wife! Today he chose, Monogamist! A second question was if their possessions would be owned together or if their possessions would be owned separately. This couple chose, "Separate". I do not know why. I suppose these two questions could be considered like a prenuptial agreement that is made publicly at the official wedding ceremony. They exchanged rings, something not done in the Traditional wedding ceremony. It was the Assistant Mayor who pronounced them husband and wife and they kissed.

The third Wedding Ceremony is usually done at the church but since this couple had already been together for 19 years, they invited the Pastor to their home. He asked them some of the same questions that the Assistant Mayor had asked and he symbolically pronounced them husband and wife after having prayed a prayer of blessing over them. Unlike in the States, the pastors here can not sign the official wedding certificate.

Next was some soft drinks and appetizer which in this case was olives with toothpick in them. Following the appetizer was a reception line called the "Presentation of gifts". The guests go up and greet the new couple and leave a gift for them. A large meal followed but I did not stay for the meal today because I had other plans before I was even invited to this wedding.

Well, again, I say HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY all those who follow my blog!